There are many philosophies when it comes to parenting and how you should raise your kids. You can’t actually reduce parenting to a few universal rules, as parents are all a little different, as are their children. Yet we can come up with a few principles, such as we’ll be covering in this article, that most parents can benefit from.
Some parents go to one extreme or another with their approach -while some are very strict, others practice what is sometimes called permissive parenting. This is sometimes a philosophy that parents hold, but it’s just as often a default mode parents fall into when they’re not comfortable enforcing rules. Parents who raise their children this way will, for example, let them run wild around a restaurant or store and apparently take no notice of it. Too much permissiveness can not only make your kids a burden on other people, it makes life difficult for the kids as well. When kids venture outside the home and go to school, meet others and eventually have to find jobs, they find that there are limits and rules everywhere, yet their parents didn’t prepare them for this. Even if kids act like they don’t like limits, on some level they need them to mature and to feel secure.
When your children do a good job with something, don’t hesitate to tell them. Parents sometimes get into the habit of only noticing the mistakes their children make. Praising children for something well done is a way to encourage them in this area. Children care a great deal about what their parents think of them, so a little bit of praise can go a long way. It’s not necessary to do this in an insincere way, as your kids will be able to sense this, but choose times when it’s appropriate.
A very bad mistake to make is to yell at your children as there are many other things you can do. This is not to say we will not raise our voices from time to time out of frustration. However, if this is something that you do all the time, it can have some unwanted consequences. Yelling at your kids on a regular basis will actually make it almost boring to them after period of time. Your kids, in turn, may start to yell at other people at school or in other places which can become problematic. Instead of yelling, speak very softly so that your children will have to quiet down to listen to what you say. Your personality, and the personality of your child, will play a large role in your relationship as you both grow older. Over time, you’ll notice that each of your children will require a different amount of discipline as each has an innate level of self-control. Many parenting skills will work, and only after you tweak them a little bit to fit each individual child and their personality.
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